she told roman that he was her concicous... and he was her right from wrong... and that she slept with a man for money today... she slept with the man that she had sold herself to in the past... I slept with stephano Dimera.... my drag momma just called her an alley cat
where have i been you ask? or where am i going for that matter? to be honest i do not know... but if i find my way ill holler... not that im really lost, but if i was could i be found? well i am now seeing that aol has added the option to here for video... and here i have been posting away on my other blog... www.thruthepurplehaze.blogspot.com with various findings from youtube... check it out... it will excite you...!!!
Love&Light
Constance
a shout out goes to Anitra who has given birth to baby Catherine Marie... i can't wait to meet her... im sure she is keeping Mommy and Daddy John pretty busy... if they send me a pic i will share on here... all my love and best wishes darlin... every time i tried to call you were sleepin... gettin ready to have a baby has got to be exhausting... and now all the feedings and the dirty diapers... ill be there in spirit helping... Love You
well the movie was filmed... getting pics prepped to change the look of myspace page as well as post some fun slideshows from of my look from that nite... they requested that i wear whore red... and when questioning them about the lines for the movie... it was improve... he said channel your inner whore... it was all so natural... ill probably get an Oscar... LOL cant really give any details on the movie, as i have signed a confidentiality agreement... i guess thats a usual thing in the film business? i dont know... but i can now say i've had my first acting role... so now i can add ACTRESS to my list of accomplishments... gonna go play with photoshop and slideshows... hope to have the fun posted soon
Love & Light
Constance
just wanted to start off saying if you check out thru the purple haze pt 2 i have posted some fabulous finds that i have found on YouTube of some favourite things... including new work from Julie Brown featuring a wonderful new song entitled... I want to be Gay!!! check it out its hilarious... the website again is www.thruthepurplehaze.blogspot.com
now before i begin the story again... i really should go back and read what i wrote before to know where to continue from...
so the story continues...
i do not remember much from the time that i was born until the time that i was little... i think that most people could relate to that statement... its not like i can pull a certain full memory out from that part... now looking thru a picture book seems like it can easily open up memories from the past, but when im eating my birthday cake when i was one and had it all over my face? It really seems like from the picture i was having a really good ol time with that birthday cake... but it doesnt cause any flashes of memories to come flooding to me...
i always loved looking thru the photo albums growing up... looking at pictures from the past, seeing how young someone once was... to be able to try to put yourself into their shoes, to try to understand what their world could have been like... what molded them... what programmed them with their values,... and what values did they try to pass on to me? i know the strongest value that i have learned from all of my family is Love... i do remember that there was so much love around me...
the photos cannot lie... i had the biggest blue eyes full of innocence, and the longest eyelashes... and a full head of luxurious blonde hair... i was the belle of the ball... i would sing and dance to twinkle twinkle little star... and wail the hell out of Delta Dawn... a song made famous by i think she was then 14 years old Tanya Tucker... Whats that flower you had on? did you say it was a mancion in the sky?
i remember that my mum hadto work alot and when i was very young i was taken care of by my Grandma, her mother, which would make that my Great Grandmother, and my Grandma's sister, my Aunt Ruthie... i remember when i was a very young child going to my Aunt Ruthie's house... the walls in the house were like a fabulous blue green on brick, it was a very interesting house... i can remember spending alot of time there... i really loved playing with Aunt Ruthie's beautiful Jewelry, I loved it... and she had these wonderful beads that i could snap together and make a really big necklace... i loved to wear it and feel pretty... the only problem with that fact, and not saying that feeling pretty is wrong, that i was a little boy...
Little boys are not supposed to want to be little girls... but at that time it was a mystery as to what made us different... and what i had to accept that i wasnt... which could lead to who i am today... but that is only further psychoanalyzation made on my part and im not a doctor or anything believe me... if you've read this far you might even have realized that i do not have a PHD and im not a psychic or anything... just another random confused individual living on this lovely rock called earth...
Anyway...i also remember going to my Great Grandma's when i was very young... i would sing and talk into the tape recorder, different things that came to my mind, i have some copies of this saved onto a cd... its pretty interesting... i loved my Great Grandma so much... she owned a hotel... it was her huge house that had been built by her husband a long time ago... made from rock, and then there were six "cabins" and then two houses at the end... she would rent them out to passer by's in the area... i also remember being at my Great Grandma's and listening to the radio with her, as she would listen to the morning radio personality... Ted Bee... believe thats how you spell it... from what i hear, thirtysome years later, Ted still has his radio program... wow... he has quite a following in the little town of Boonville and New Franklin...
Pringles and Ovaltene? dont know how you spell it... but those were some of the things that i remember loving as a child... my Great Grandma would always have these things... plus, she would make me some wonderful custardto drink... i would love to have some of that custard now... But onto my Great Grandma's wonderful daughter... the woman that was truly my best friend... My Grandma Allie... she was a truly a beautiful woman with a very big heart, someone whos presence in my life i truly miss... but that is a long way coming in my story, and she loved me more than anything...
to be continued
Like all stories... they have a beginning, a middle and and end... this story doesn't have the ending written yet, but it does have a beginning and plenty of middle, and will be full of a bunch of psychoanilization to find out who in this world i truly am... what i was brought into this world to be, and plenty of questions that might get answered as i go thru and tell everything that i can remember, and how it affected me as a person to drive me to who i am now and who i could be in the future... so lets re begin this story at the beginning... where it all started...
Once upon a time... in a small city in Missouri, a beautiful young girl was in a hospital, she was barely 18... She was about to give birth... but she was only 7 1/2 months pregnant so the baby would be premature. She had a family that loved her very much, and made sure she knew that they would be there for her no matter what... considering the baby's father didn't want anything to do with this child... and his lovely mother even tried to convince this young girl to have an abortion... The two families were filled with hatred for each other... and the innocent one was about to enter this world...
on November 4th, 1970 the premmie entered this world, less than five pounds... the baby would have to remain in the hospital for over a month to be over five pounds so it could leave the hospital (why is it now i never have a problem gaining weight?) Born to the world was a beautiful baby with big blue eyes, blonde hair, complete with a white streak that Grandma pointed out in the incub... The baby was well loved by its Mom, Grandma, Grandpa, and plenty of Aunts, Uncles and Great Aunts, and beautiful wise Great Grandmothers... Just no Father around... but that is a factor that will weigh in thru out the story... the story has only just begun... stay tuned for the next installment... until then
all my love
Constance
